Will Anybody Ever Love Me?

Yes.

The other day, I asked a friend to recommend me some country music artists that I could listen to. I told her that after 11 years living in Montana, it was time for me to get into this genre. She recommended me a few artists, and the one I’ve gravitated toward the most is Zach Bryan.

But I miss you in the mornings when I see the sun
Somethin’ in the orange tells me we’re not done

His lyrics are heartfelt, heartbreaking, and beautiful.

He said the sun’s going to rise tomorrow
Somewhere on the east side of sorrow

I wish I didn’t take so long to get into country music. It is something else, and Zach Bryan is incredible. I am happy to own a few of his albums, and that I’ve let go of whatever stigma I once had about country music. It is a great genre of music.

Been jamming to this song over the last day. Love it.

Didn’t know there was a French version of it and now I’m hooked!

This might be the best version. So damn sexy.

One of my favorite YouTube channels is Masahiro Sakurai on Creating Games, and a few days ago, he released this video of some of my favorite video game music (Zelda! Xenoblade Chronicles!) being performed live in Japan by an orchestra as part of the Press Start: Symphony of Games concert series. If you’re a fan of these video games, or really, video games in general, you should definitely watch this. A whole nine plus minutes of Xenoblade Chronicles music? Oh my goodness.

One of the reasons why I buy music I enjoy and love is because when I was a kid, I used to pirate all my music. Like many, it started with Napster, then moved on to other peer-to-peer file sharing programs like Soulseek, and ended with torrents. I spent all my free time during my late teens and early 20s simply reading about, downloading (pirating), and listening to music. And I wasn’t discriminate about it. I downloaded everything—my focus was on full catalogs. Bob Dylan? The Beatles? Chuck Berry? Miles Davis? I found and downloaded everything they released. At its peak, my collection consisted of tens of thousands of songs, all of which I listened to regularly. I was addicted and a bit insane. At one point, I saved all these mp3s onto dozens and dozens of data CDs, then onto multiple iPods, and eventually, into a single, high capacity hard drive. This served me well for a long time… until I moved to Montana and this hard drive failed.

All my music, all that music I spent years collecting and organizing and listening to? Gone.

Except for the stuff I purchased legally. That stuff has stuck around. At the time, losing my hard drive full of pirated music (and movies and TV shows) felt like I lost a good friend or a family member. I was heartbroken, but it turned out to be a blessing in disguise. I always knew pirating was wrong, but I was broke and acquiring all this media was easy, so I ignored that voice in my head and did it anyway. With the loss of this hard drive, though, came the opportunity to change my ways and to do the right thing. So I did, and I have.

I’ve been purchasing my music ever since, and I don’t see myself ever changing that. With that said, I purchased more music today on this last Bandcamp Friday until August, and here is today’s haul.

Even though I pirated a lot of music while I was in college, I spent a lot of money going to concerts. All the bands and artists I wanted to see (and learned about from my pirating habit) came through Los Angeles, so I was able to see a lot of bands.

One of them was Maxïmo Park, an alt rock band from Newcastle. In 2007, they released Our Earthly Pleasures, their second studio album, and they came by LA in support of it. I did not buy this album, but their first one, A Certain Trigger:

I hadn’t listened to this album in probably ten years, and all it did while listening to it was bring back memories of my late college years. I had purchased the Canon PowerShot A550 around that time, and I took it with me to their show. There’s a blurry photo of Paul Smith at the top of this article, and there are way more where that came from, but I’ll keep those to myself.

Around the same time I went to see Maxïmo Park, I took my friend Brian to see The Go! Team at the Echoplex. This was a really fun show, one I remember as the one where I saw Adrian Grenier in the audience. Entourage was big at the time, so I thought that was really cool. I still think Thunder, Lightning, Strike holds up, all these years later.

You know how I said I liked to download full catalogs? One of my main aims was to educate myself on music history, and one of those bands that popped up over and over in my research was Pavement, one of the best bands of the 90s. Since the great hard drive crash of 2012, I hadn’t supported this band… until now. Wowee Zowee is still as good as when I first heard it. What a classic.

I think in my research I also came across this band called Porcupine Tree, “the biggest rock band most people have never heard of.” I remember I had In Absentia on repeat for weeks, and again, I think it still holds up. I’m listening to it now, and I feel like I’m back in college, walking the streets of LA with my wired iPod headphones, and jamming out to my own personal soundtrack.

This next one is random, but one I’m glad I found on Bandcamp. I’ve never really been a big fan of death metal, but I remember when I first listened to this album, I felt like I could finally, sorta, understand the appeal. Disfear’s Live the Storm is probably the one and only death metal album I will ever enjoy and own, and that’s okay. It’s fucking good.

These next few albums are more recent releases, so I never pirated them in my youth.

I’ve been a fan of Yves Tumor since I first listened to Heaven to a Tortured Mind in 2020, an absolutely incredible album. Here is his most recent album, and judging by a few of the singles he’s released, I know I’m already going to love this one.

I hadn’t really heard much of Indigo De Souza, but when I saw her video for the song Younger & Dumber, I knew she was an artist I wanted to keep my eye on and support. To my surprise, she’s offering these two albums with whatever price you’d like to pay, so there’s no reason not to check her out. These two albums? 🔥🔥🔥

I realize not everyone has the same musical taste as me, and that’s fine. We’re each our own person. My hope is that maybe I introduced someone to music they’ve never listened to before, and in turn, they go and support these or other artists in the future. We all deserve to get paid, especially artists, for the work we produce. Let’s stick together and have each other’s backs.

I watched this performance by Hania Rani last night, and I immediately fell in love. I found her Bandcamp, and today, I bought two of her albums:

Without question, they’re good, and I love them. Along with Hania’s albums, I bought these four albums:

This music puts me in a certain mood, a mood I like to live in. Maybe you will, too.

I love music (who doesn’t?), and in America, you show how much you love something by how much you paid for it, so how much did I spend on music this year?!

I spent $937.22 on music this year. Is that a lot? I feel like that’s a lot. That’s an average of $78.10 a month, which, yeah, feels about right. That’s also about 93 to 94 albums in a year, or about 7 to 8 new albums a month, which, yeah, also sounds about right. I think one of the main questions some people will have is: why not subscribe to Spotify or Apple Music or another streaming music service? And my answer to that is:

Fuuuuuuuuuuuck streaming music services. Fuck them all to hell.

I used to subscribe to Apple Music. For a few years, actually. I paid for their $99 annual plan, which came out to $8.25 a month. For $8.25 a month, I could listen to all the music I wanted. It was great! I listened to everything, and I discovered many great new artists. All in all, I had a great time with Apple Music… until I canceled it during one fire season. I had plans to renew it later, but I wouldn’t need it during fire season because I would be in the mountains where service was spotty and where I wouldn’t really have the time or the energy to listen to music anyway. And when I canceled it, I saw the last few years’ worth of music—music I’ve spent time listening to and curating and rating—vanish. Of course it vanished, but I still felt like a big part of me just died. All my new artists, all my playlists, all the work I did to curate my library to my tastes—all gone. So what did I actually pay for? All those hundreds of dollars?

For limited access to an infinite number of songs. I was renting this music—it wasn’t mine. And right then it hit me:

Fuuuuuuuuuuuck streaming music services. Fuck them all to hell.

The only music left in my music app was all the music I purchased before I subscribed to Apple Music, before I spent hundreds of dollars on… honestly? Nothing. It’s like spending $20 for a movie ticket—the cost is in the experience, and for $99 a year, I was allowed access to this musical experience for a limited time, and if I wanted continued access to it, I would have to spend more and more of my money. I would have rather spent that money on buying my music—for sure, far fewer albums than before, but at least I would own them.

And so, that’s why I’ve spent $937.22 on music this year, and why I will continue to spend more than $99 a year on music, more than $8.25 or $9.99 a month on music. Besides, the artists making this music deserve to get paid, and they get paid more when I buy their music directly rather than if I streamed it.

Do I recommend you buy your music, too? I don’t care. If you want, I guess. If you’re happy renting your music from these big companies, then more power to you. For me, though, I’m just fine spending almost $1,000 a year on music, and I will continue doing so for as long as I have money to spend.

I forgot about Bandcamp Friday. Here are the (admittedly) few albums I purchased today:

• First things first, whenever there’s a new Doon Kanda album, I’m excited. Instant buy.
• Millions Now Living Will Never Die by Tortoise. Need I say more?
• Thanks to Last.fm, I found and bought Hyper Light Drifter by Disasterpeace. I played and loved the game last year, and the soundtrack was a big reason why. Glad to own it now.

Now to actually listen to all this music. Good times ahead.

The friendly competition between my friend and me is ongoing, and she has been kicking my ass all week. Today, I decided to change that by doing 30 minutes of yoga in the morning, then a 20 minute strength workout followed by a 20 minute HIIT workout in the afternoon. I’m now kicking her ass, but at what cost?

Here are some notes from today, this 2nd day of December, 2022:

Hibernation Mode

God or whoever decided to take a cold dump on us yesterday. Tis the season and all that.

I’ve been telling my friends that it’s hibernating in my cave time, but they’re having none of it. I was invited to a friend’s house tomorrow, and I told her I’d be there. Who am I?

I am shutting down my social channels, because that I can control. My feeds will be auto-posting to Mastodon but I won’t be checking it for anything for an indeterminate amount of time. Maybe once the sun comes out again?

I want to focus on my work and health this season. Part of that work involves writing my novel again.

ChatGPT

I tried ChatGPT today, and, of course, because my mind was on my novel, I started my conversation with that. Let me just say, I was very impressed! I can totally see Google or whoever using this technology to power their search engine, and instead of a list of links, we could all one day be having a conversation with ChatGPT or what(who?)ever to find the information we’re looking for. I’m curious to see where this goes.

The Chat

I’m writing a novel about the origins of human mythology—gods and demons and the story we tell ourselves about the world we see. What are some good books to get me started on my research?

There are many great books that explore the origins of human mythology and religion. Some of the classics in the field include “The Hero with a Thousand Faces” by Joseph Campbell, “The Power of Myth” by Joseph Campbell and Bill Moyers, and “The Golden Bough” by Sir James Frazer. These books offer insight into the common themes and motifs found in myths and religious stories from around the world. Additionally, books like “Gods, Demons, and Symbols of Ancient Mesopotamia” by Jeremy Black and “The Ancient Gods Speak” by Donald B. Redford offer more specific insights into the mythology of ancient cultures.

Could you tell me more about what “The Golden Bough” by Sir James Frazer is about?

Certainly! “The Golden Bough” is a classic work of comparative mythology and religion by Sir James Frazer. The book is a wide-ranging exploration of the beliefs, customs, and institutions of various cultures from around the world, with a focus on the role of magic and religion in shaping human society. One of the central ideas of the book is the concept of the “sacred king,” a figure who is believed to possess divine power and who serves as the link between the human and spiritual worlds. The book also explores the rituals and practices associated with the sacred king, including the concept of the “golden bough,” a symbol of his power and authority. Overall, “The Golden Bough” offers a fascinating look at the beliefs and practices of different cultures and is a valuable resource for anyone interested in the origins of human mythology and religion.

What have others said about James Frazer’s idea of the “sacred king”?

Frazer’s concept of the “sacred king” has been both highly influential and highly controversial. Some have praised the book for its comprehensive approach to the study of mythology and religion, as well as its innovative ideas about the role of magic and ritual in shaping human societies. Others, however, have criticized the book for its outdated and overly broad approach to the subject, as well as its lack of focus on the specific beliefs and practices of individual cultures. Some have also questioned the validity of Frazer’s ideas, arguing that they are based on outdated and flawed assumptions about the nature of religion and myth. Despite these criticisms, “The Golden Bough” remains an important and widely read work in the field of comparative mythology and religion.

What other books did “The Hero with a Thousand Faces” inspire?

“The Hero with a Thousand Faces” by Joseph Campbell is a highly influential work in the field of comparative mythology and religion. In the book, Campbell explores the common themes and motifs found in myths and folktales from around the world, and argues that these stories can be seen as part of a universal “monomyth” or hero’s journey. Campbell’s ideas have had a profound impact on a wide range of fields, including literature, psychology, and film.

One of the most notable books influenced by “The Hero with a Thousand Faces” is “The Power of Myth,” a book that grew out of a series of conversations between Campbell and journalist Bill Moyers. In the book, Campbell expands on many of the ideas from “The Hero with a Thousand Faces,” discussing the role of myth and religion in shaping human culture and experience.

Other books that have been influenced by “The Hero with a Thousand Faces” include “The Writer’s Journey: Mythic Structure for Writers” by Christopher Vogler, which applies Campbell’s ideas to the field of screenwriting, and “The Inner Reaches of Outer Space: Metaphor as Myth and as Religion” by Joseph Campbell, which explores the role of myth and metaphor in shaping human understanding of the world. Overall, “The Hero with a Thousand Faces” has had a significant impact on the study of mythology and religion, and continues to inspire new ideas and approaches in these fields.

When I came up with my story idea, the first book I thought of was The Hero with a Thousand Faces. I read that over a decade ago, so it’s been on my list of books to re-read. Earlier this year, I watched The Power of Myth, and it was incredible. I immediately bought the book, and it’s on my “to read” shelf as I write this. I’m amazed ChatGPT started off with these two works, and the other books it mentioned blew my mind. I had never heard of The Golden Bough by Sir James Frazer, but I am definitely intrigued. If anything, it gave me a reading list to checkout:

• Gods, Demons, and Symbols of Ancient Mesopotamia by Jeremy Black
• The Ancient Gods Speak by Donald B. Redford
• The Writer’s Journey: Mythic Structure for Writers by Christopher Vogler
• The Inner Reaches of Outer Space: Metaphor as Myth and as Religion by Joseph Campbell

I have to say, this is really cool technology, and I am intrigued to see where this goes.

Ping

Remember Ping, Apple’s failed social network built into iTunes? I remember being interested in it when I watched Steve Jobs announce it, and I did try it for a few weeks after it launched. I followed some celebrities on there and watched as the feed showed that so and so just bought the new White Stripes album or whatever. I liked it, but then yeah, the spam, the fake accounts…

But in that similar spirit, here are some albums I bought this week:

• Björk: Medulla
• Björk: Biophilia
• Björk: Utopia
• The Knife: Deep Cuts
• Sudan Archives: Athena
• Sudan Archives: Natural Brown Prom Queen
• SZA: Ctrl (Deluxe)

I finished buying Björk’s discography, which makes me happy. Not having Deep Cuts by the Knife was an oversight on my part, so I needed to rectify that ASAP. I had been a fan of Sudan Archives since I discovered her over the summer, so I’ve been enjoying her two albums. SZA has not been on my radar at all, but I sometimes like to buy albums I know nothing about but that have received good reviews just to expand my musical tastes. So far, I’m loving her. Really good.

Yesterday, I also subscribed to Last.fm Pro. I’ve been “scrobbling since 15 Jan 2022,” and I enjoy it. Considering I’d rather buy my music than stream it, I am curious to see what kind of trends I’ve had this year, similar to Spotify’s Wrapped or Apple Music’s Replay. You can find me on Last.fm over here.

I grew up in the ‘90s, and one of the most popular channels in my household growing up was MTV. Our family loved tuning into MTV and watching music video after music video (yes, MTV used to play music videos!). Every day before school, my mom would turn on the TV, and we would all get ready for school listening to the music from these videos. When I finished getting ready for school, I would sit on the couch waiting for my siblings to finish getting ready and watch music videos by Aerosmith and Jamiroquai and Mariah Carey and Nirvana, and on and on it went, music video after music video. This was my childhood, and I didn’t know I missed it until I inadvertently stumbled into my own music video channel.

A few years ago, I made an attempt to get rid of my reliance on Google and their services. At the time, ever since Google Reader’s demise (RIP), I had began transitioning away from Google, but I never made the full transition. I had switched from Google Search to DuckDuckGo, from Google’s productivity suite to Markdown files and Apple’s capable alternatives, from Gmail to iCloud Mail, but the one service I could not replace was YouTube. For years I kept my Google account active because of YouTube. I wanted to keep track of my subscriptions, to like videos, to create playlists—to use YouTube, essentially. But there was a way I could delete my Google account and still use YouTube without having to visit their website and watch their ads and train their algorithm.

That way was by using youtube-dl.

Using a command-line and a bit of configuration, I could use youtube-dl to download any video from YouTube at whatever quality I wanted, with whatever settings I wanted, and watch it later on whatever device I wanted. The original youtube-dl has, sadly, gone dormant, but because the project is open-source, some awesome people have forked it and made their own version, yt-dlp.

yt-dlp picks up where youtube-dl left off, and they have been awesome at keeping this project active and up-to-date.

Once I had yt-dlp setup, the next challenge was to “subscribe” to all my favorite channels so I wouldn’t miss any videos. Fortunately, YouTube has made it so each channel has its own RSS feed, and many RSS readers support YouTube right out of the box. My feed reader of choice, Reeder, supports YouTube, so adding all my favorite channels was a breeze.

Finally, I needed a place to watch my videos, and for me, the best app for this is Plex. Plex has been around forever, unlike others (remember Boxee???), and they have apps for most devices out there. I use them on my Apple TV, and the app has been nothing but great.

With yt-dlp setup, with a way to get all the videos I want, and with a way to watch them, my dependence on my Google account vanished, and I could finally delete my Google account. So a few years ago, I did.

But wait, I might hear you saying, wasn’t this supposed to be about creating my own music video channel?

Why yes! Yes it was. I wanted to get all that out of the way to get to how I do things. First things first, here is the command I use to download my videos:

yt-dlp -o '/path/to/YouTube/%(uploader)s-%(upload_date)s-%(title)s.%(ext)s'
--download-archive '/path/to/archive.md'
-f 'bestvideo+bestaudio/best'
--sub-langs all,-live_chat
--embed-subs
--yes-playlist
--batch-file '/path/to/youtube.md'

I have a dedicated YouTube folder on an external SSD (CALYPSO) that saves each video with the channel name first, the upload date, then the title of the video. For example, downloading this video by Jomboy Media will output as: Jomboy Media-20221117-Tom Brady falls and trips player during botched trick play, a breakdown.webm. I prefer this format because sometimes I can go days or weeks without watching videos, and when I find the time, I like watching a certain channel’s output by the order they were released and catch up that way. It’s how I like to watch my videos.

The --download-archive setting helps ensure I don’t download the same video twice.

The -f 'bestvideo+bestaudio/best' ensures I get the highest quality version available.

I follow lots of foreign-language channels, so --sub-langs all,-live_chat helps download subs, and --embed-subs simply embeds the file in the video itself, and when I go to watch it on Plex, I can select the file and view the video with subtitles.

--yes-playlist downloads playlists. Simple enough.

Finally, --batch-file and the file itself is where some of the magic happens. I can go through my day, and I can simply add the URLs for all the YouTube videos I come across in my various feeds and append them to this file, and when I’m ready to download them, I run my yt-dlp command once, and all my videos start downloading. It’s really nice.

I know there are ways to run this automatically or on a schedule, but I download my videos to an SSD I take with me everywhere, and I don’t want my desktop at home to be my only media server. So I run this command manually when I need to, and it has worked fine for me.

As part of my RSS subscriptions, I subscribe to a lot of music websites and YouTube channels. Whenever there’s a new video out, either from someone I know or, especially, someone I don’t, I add the video to my YouTube.md file, and sometime later, after adding more and more videos to this file, I download all the videos.

Within my main YouTube folder, I have another folder called music, and within this folder, I add every music video and song I have downloaded. I do this for days, weeks, sometimes months, and I don’t watch them. I let them pile up for a while, and when I’m feeling the urge to sit on my couch and jam out to some music videos, I navigate to this folder in Plex—and here’s the fun part—I click on the “shuffle” button.

Music video bliss.

Doing this has brought back all the nostalgia from my childhood, back when I could sit on my couch before having to go to school and simply watch and listen to some amazing music. Those really were the days…