I feel good. Actually, I feel great. That’s not something I could’ve said sixty days ago. I can’t believe it’s been sixty days. Sixty days. Two months ago I had my heart broken, my actions disappointed me, and my life seemed to be in shambles. Now? Now I’m in a good place. I have hope for my future, and I can’t wait to live my damn life the way I want to. I’m in charge, and that’s something I’ve never fully internalized until I started this blog. This blog has been up and running for sixty days, and each one of those sixty days has an entry. Sixty straight entries. Holy shit.
I’m not sure why I’m putting so much significance on this number. My goal has always been three hundred and sixty-five. So… three hundred and five more entries to go! I can do it. Three hundred more entries? Piece of cake.
Writing is my life
The struggle with writing a daily blog is having something to say every day. I admit, I usually don’t have something of significance to say every day, but if I didn’t write every day, those entries that actually mean something to me would never have been written. If anything, this blog has chronicled my journey to become a more disciplined writer. All I’m doing and all I’m hoping to do revolves around the fact that I’m a writer, and that’s a role I no longer want to take for granted.
I’ve been having this nagging urge to write more every day. Some professional writers write for hours every day. I write for maybe forty-five minutes every morning and about the same every night. I don’t write more because I have so much to do already. I have to eat breakfast, I have to meditate, I have to go to work, I have to workout, I have to read, I have to eat dinner, I have to shower, and I have to sleep. There’s only so many hours in the day. And I have to have some fun or else I’ll burn out much more quickly.
Ideas for the future
Thirty days ago I gave myself three goals to try and accomplish by the end of the next thirty days. Today I finished a book — The Creative Habit by Twyla Tharp — but I don’t think I read that much more. I was also supposed to measure my body fat to determine if my whey protein powder made me gain any fat and not muscle. Earlier this week, I ran out of my protein powder, and I decided to quit using that. I think it helped me gain muscle, which was my goal for adding it to my diet, but I’m now more interested in fueling my body with healthier and more nutritious options. Today my package of Primal Fuel came and that’s something I’ll be using from now on. I tried a shake today, and it tasted delicious. Here’s hoping it helps me out. My third and final goal was to develop some sort of framework to develop my personal philosophy. I believe this blog has been my vehicle for that. I wrote about this a few days ago.
Am I going to create some goals for me for the next thirty days? No, not really. I hope to keep up with my current routine. I hope to maybe add a few more things to my routine to make me better than I am today. I also hope to stretch myself a bit and maybe develop some new hobbies. Eventually I hope to be more serious about my coffee by actually grinding my own beans and experimenting with different brew methods. I’m also really eager to explore photography by buying a very good camera and lens and taking more pictures of the beautiful state of Montana I’ve called home for almost three years. Finally, I hope to finish furnishing my home with everything I need and want and decorate it with my own style and design sensibilities.
All these hopes are endeavors that improve and expand my creativity. I love creating. I really fucking love creating. If this blog is any indication, I love creating the type of life I want to live. It’s hard work. It can get slow, tough, and seeming hopeless sometimes, but it can also be so much fun and pleasurable.
Focusing on designing a life I want to live and actually living that life is one of those things I’m always going to enjoy. And like any artist, I’ll never be satisfied. I’ll always be tinkering with it, but unlike art, I’m not going to decide when it’s all done. That’ll be left up to Nature herself.
I want to keep her waiting for a long time, though.