Dating

When I was younger, I read this short story about a guy who was locked up in prison, and he was given access to as many books as he wanted. He read as much as he could, and he bettered himself as much as he could, so by the end of the story, he left prison a different and much better man. I forgot what this story was called, but as I grew older, I became acquainted with other books with similar themes. Obviously there’s the Count of Monte Cristo, a book I have not read yet but really want to. I’ve seen a few different film adaptations, though, and the scene I enjoy the most is when he’s locked up in prison. During high school, I read the Autobiography of Malcolm X. In it, he gets locked up and decides to change for the better. One of the things he does is to read the dictionary so he could be a better communicator. For some reason, I loved that, so I read the dictionary a few years ago, and I’m still recalling interesting words I learned from this activity.

I live in a little studio apartment with very few things. I have a bed, a table, and a chair. There’s a kitchen and a bathroom, too, but that’s really it. I’ve been living inside this prison for almost two years now, and for the most part, I’ve loved it. It’s my home, and I’ve accomplished some great things here. It’s simple, so I’m not that distracted with trivial things, and it has what I need. But it doesn’t have everything I need. I’ve blinded myself from a few essential things that would make my life happier. That’s people.

I love my friends, but my best friends are scattered all across the country. I have friends all over Southern California, some in Northern California, others in New York, and yet more all over the country. I’ve lived in Montana for almost three years, and I haven’t made as many friends as I would have liked. Don’t get me started on my dating life. I need to change all this. I need to be more active and pursue this part of life with all I’ve got. I need to meet more people because I’m not going to find a girl locked up in my own little prison. I can leave any time I want, but I choose not to. Why? I don’t know. It’s this not knowing that irritates me. Am I shy? Am I lazy? Am I scared? What is it?

I joined a crappy dating site today, and I wasn’t attracted to most of the girls I saw on there, and the girls I was attracted to live very, very far away. All the good girls seem to be taken around here. This is one of the worst things about living in such a sparsely populated area. I think most of the girls I’d be interested in leave and go live somewhere else, or they’re snatched up quickly by someone else. I’ve met very attractive yet very taken girls, and there’s no way I’m going to break anyone up. That’s just wrong. I need to start dating, though, and if I have to spend a lot of time and energy scouring my area for attractive girls who look interesting, so be it, right? I’m not going anywhere for at least another year, so this is something I have to do. And I have to move on. It’s been too long now.

Anyone in Montana who happens to read this know of anyone you might want to set me up with? Let me know! I’m dead serious, unfortunately.